Dear SkyMall, if you continue to sell the things you sell, people are going to continue to ridicule you. Sure, those pet doors look quite useful and I even kind of like the Hobbit rings, but the Bed-Bug-Thwarting Sleeping Cocoon? You might just try to sell someone A NEW MATTRESS instead.
Here are a few of my top picks for today’s forehead-slapping moment.
Remember pet rocks? Well, now for just $24.95, you can get one that even tells you it loves you! Because that’s what humans crave. Rocks that love them. Or, you can give it to your amour, because as one SkyMall reviewer wrote, it’s “even better than saying ‘I love you.’” Uh, no, I don’t actually think it is, dude. (This same reviewer also said he’s been married for 21 years, so maybe this stupid rock really does work.) A different reviewer listed one of the product’s cons as “huge” and “would have preferred the size of an egg.” Is he shy about his love? At any rate, I think the whole concept would be much more effective if it didn’t have “Written in stone” etched on it and in quotation marks. I guess they really wanted to drive the point home. Wham, like a rock to the head.
I don’t want to pick on people with hair-loss issues—I imagine that it can really suck (personally, I have a hair growth issue, as in, it’s growing on my chin and out of my nose). That said, if you fall into the trap of paying $695 for a pair of audio speakers, then perhaps a full head of hair would only serve to block the signals you’ve been getting from the aliens telling you to wear this bloody thing and dance naked in the front yard (please, don’t post photos). The igrow Hair Rejuvenation Laser’s iPod/MP3 compatibility is a well-liked feature, however. All of the reviews for this product comment on how nice it is to listen to music; there’s nothing written to say that this helmet actually makes your hair grow.
Do you ever worry about your sneakers leaving marks on your walls when you do Achilles stretches? Me neither. But if you have 30 bucks to trade for something that will eventually make a good chew toy for your dog, then the FootSmart SmartFlexx is for you. This highly-engineered device purports to relieve pain associated with plantar fasciitis, Achilles tendonitis, ankle strain, arch pain and other chronic conditions, and it may well do so. Or, you could just use the wall to do the stretches like everybody has been doing forever.
What’s your favorite SkyMall product (in the context of ‘completely ridiculous’ as opposed to ‘favorite’)? Or have you bought something from the catalog that turned out to be a winner? (We won’t laugh at you if you tell us. Okay, maybe we will, but just a little).
I’m casting this vote in hubby’s favor… there’s a train your cat to poop in the toilet product. He says the look on the cat’s face is priceless.
Haaaa! I found it, and he’s right. And the product is called “Litter Kwitter,” of course. 😛
Oh Laura! You’ve just introduced me to a treasure trove of shopping delights!! I hadn’t heard of SkyMall until this blog post!
Jeri’s husband is correct, the look on the cat’s face is priceless but I also had a chuckle and guffaw over the photo for the COZY Touch Screen Glove.
Thank you for another blog post that had me in stitches! You always make me laugh!
Hugs, Jo-Anne
It’s a total treasure trove, Jo-Anne! If only I’d thought to mention it to Kern for her ‘S’ post during the blog challenge. You can lose hours on their site, or kill the better part of a domestic flight with the paper copy of the magazine. I’m so glad that I can make you laugh, too! I just sent a card to a friend that says “Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.” xo
What fantastic ways to totally waste money! 🙂
Indeed. And yet, people do. We’re odd creatures.
Aw, Laura, did you miss the Message Beans? Who can resist a bean that says, “I Love You” or “Forgive Me” or “Get Well Soon?” The message you choose is printed on the seed pod and takes just a week or two to appear–in a sunny spot, of course.
Who buys this stuff? And why?
Found ’em now… 13 bucks! I’m going to make my own, put them in recycled soda cans and sell them for 10 to undercut SkyMall.
Sometimes I feel like buying some of the stuff just so I can display it and scare my friends. 😛
The “written in stone” cracked me up!
Seriously, hey?!!
I love the “Electronic Pest Repellants”. Science and common sense say they don’t work but apparently there is commerce in selling silliness and for SkyMall and many SkyMall consumers, that is really all that matters.
With some things, people just want it to work so much they’ll talk themselves into believing. I wish the pest repellants worked! We have trails and tunnels and nests from all sorts of creatures in our yard but I’m not a fan of the poison option.
LOL. I once bought a jewelry box from them specifically to keep necklace chains untangled. It sort of works.
Now THAT is a never ending problem. We should become jewelry box designers, there’s probably some really good money in it!