Apologies in advance to all of the high school kids I’m about to annoy, but I am so excited for school to start again! No, it’s not because I’ve got children of my own and I’m dying to get them out of my hair (that last phrase should be an indication of my suitability as a parent). I’ve had a mini-epiphany recently that led to an idea that led to a project, however, it requires the presence of juniors and seniors during their Social Studies class.
Let me back the train up for a moment. When I started writing about my life with my mum, my original idea was to do a book that was half memoir and half information and resources. I really, really wanted there to be a helpful, practical component to the work, knowing that there are tens of thousands of people out there who have a family member with schizophrenia and who are probably going through some of the same crappy crap I went through for way too many years. But the problem was that book structure didn’t feel right, and the mental visualization of me trying to communicate that type of information as a speaker didn’t jive, either.
Still, I pursued it. I read The Perfect Storm and Into Thin Air to look at how Junger and Krakauer wove the telling of disastrous events with background information on fishing boats and mountain climbing. I did a whole bunch of research on my mum’s illness (not a bad thing) and pondered how to present the information in my book when services, support and laws differ so much across states, provinces and countries. And then finally, I let the idea go, and concentrated on writing my story, the memoir. I decided to trust that something else would emerge that would give me an opportunity to act as an educator.
I’m really glad I put on my Patience Pants because one day, suddenly, a new idea came to me that the best way to make a difference was to tell my story to high school students. After all, those were the toughest years for me and my sister, our most confusing years. How many other kids are out there who have a mentally-ill parent and who don’t actually understand that they are mentally ill?
One of the first things I did was email Eleanor Owen, a fellow writer and one of the co-founders of the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI). She also happens to live in Seattle, lucky me. Her response came back telling me her son (who has schizophrenia) routinely speaks to high school students and that schools love to have visiting speakers. This all brings me back to where I started—I’m so excited for school to start again! In the meantime, I shall be crafting my presentation and looking for a test audience.
They say a life with purpose is a happy life. Now that I’ve totally recovered from my failed aspirations as a Spice Girl, I’m starting to feel a fresh happiness take hold. The idea of singing ‘Wannabe’ in front of a crowd of thousands never really felt right anyway. This new idea feels different. I think this one may just work out.
The school is fortunate to have you. This is a vital and important subject, and high school students, in particular, need to learn about the nuances of mental illness as early as possible. That can make all of the difference in the world. And you aren’t standing there quoting from some dry, dull textbook. You have the emotion of your own personal experiences. They will listen to you. Keep talking.
Thank you, Caleb. My friend also brought up that those without mental illness in their world will benefit from the development of empathy, and I hope that will be true, too.
I am so excited for this new adventure you have found. I think it is an important message to get out there; so children do not feel so alone and confused in similar situations.
Oh yes, that’s such a common theme in the world: we don’t want to feel like we’re alone in our struggles. I do hope I can alleviate that for some. Thanks for reading, Jayme!
I think you had a wonderful idea. Go tell your story. It’s going to help both you and them. I think then that your idea will evolve into a book. When you have something truly difficult to tell, maybe it can be best told in a fictional tale, one that allows both the author and the reader to observe it from a safe distance.
Well, now you’ve got me thinking about writing fiction, Jack! Well done. Ha! I’m still moving forward with the memoir, too, and getting some good objectivity from my critique partners.
So pleased for you, Laura! To be excited about a project, have something important to offer, feel passionate about giving back. And a funny dog, a great husband and good friends. Life is good! Hope you video your presentations so we can share in your success. Bravo!
Life is very good! And I’d not even thought of doing a video, but what a grand idea. My great husband can help me with that! Hugs to you, Molly.
Wow, this is a great and I bet very helpful project, Laura. For all parties involved! Kudos to you and I wish you the best with it. 🙂
So glad you stopped by! Thank you very much, Veronica.
The first time someone comes up to you saying how much you have helped them with your story and wisdom, you will forget all about that Spice Girl aspiration! This will touch your heart and soul even more than it will touch the hearts and souls of those who hear your talks, because I believe that we receive much more than we could ever give when we truly give. Enjoy the added success that is sure to come your way!
Just reading your comment already started the waterworks. I love what you’ve said, and it also made me think, “hmm, this is really going to be great practice for me at being vulnerable” because I also think the more vulnerability I can allow, the more receptive my receptors will be for receiving! Thank you, Mary.
That’s great to hear! It probably would have made a big difference if anyone ever came to my school to talk about mental illness. My mother’s bipolar struggles were well-documented and diagnosed, but I certainly knew a few parents of various friends who showed traits that reminded me of what I’d witnessed at home, but never were properly diagnosed (to my knowledge). Mental illness is still such a taboo subject, but like all things, the more it can be talked about and experiences shared, the better we can all cope and understand its effects on everyone involved.
It is actually kind of weird how much stigma and ‘taboo-ness’ still exists around mental illness when we’ve come so far in acceptance in other areas. And I think if someone had come to my school to talk about it, I might have reached out to someone for help and support, instead of shouldering it all quietly because I was so confused. So here’s to taking steps for change! I’ll let you know how it goes. 🙂
And I bet this one may be able to keep you out of the principal’s office for a change. Seriousness aside, a friend in Edmonton (bi-polar) has found a ready reception in many venues. We are still in the dark ages in regards to people’s notions about mental illness. One group that was particularly receptive was the police force so that their handling of an individual symptomatic of bi-polar or schizophrenic conditions created the least amount of trauma. Your idea about school kids is a real winner too.
Oh, I could tell you some funny stories about the principal’s office! And yes, your comment makes me want to find out what kinds of speakers are going out to meet with the police in Seattle and see if they’re getting that kind of exposure. I think I could definitely bring a different perspective to them — one of the child trying to get help for a parent (I engaged the police in B.C. a couple of times, and they’d go to my mum’s door, then just leave when she wouldn’t let them in). But they also really need to hear from people who are recovering from serious mental illness as we’ve had some terribly mishandled cases in recent memory where the police have killed people who were acting out due to their illness. Thank you for getting my brain going on that, Christina.
That is a great strategy Laura. The best way to make a change is to teach the younger generations, because they are the future. Teaching students will not only make them be more tolerant towards those with mental illness, but will also make them aware of the problem involved with dealing with a family member with this condition.
Thanks, Rolando. I always appreciate your support.
Oh Laura! This is so awesome! You are going to help so many kids, I can just see it! Sooooo glad you are doing this. <3 Jodi
Thank you, thank you, thank you!
That’s wonderful, Laura! Can you imagine how helpful and reassuring that would have been for us when we were in high school to know we weren’t the only ones going through all of that. And to know there was somewhere to go for a helping hand.
Congratulations on a terrific idea! Please let us know how it goes.
Oh man, how I wish there’d been some mental illness education in school! I will keep you posted on how it goes, for sure. Thanks, Mary.
I’m so very proud of, and impressed by, you! Way to go, girl! Looking forward to following where this leads you!
Thank you so much, Galit. Whenever I’m feeling a little (or a lot) scared about being so vulnerable, it’s the amazing support from friends like you that bolster me.